Another book Hiding From Love , describes several common hiding styles that people use . For years now I have gone over the different ways people might use to hide from God's love and asked the Holy Spirit to show me if they applied to my life.
Also I have asked Him for years, what is my problem with money management ? I have been just trying not to hide from Him when I messed up again. Trying to believe that His love never changes, that nothing , even my bad accounting practices, will not separate me from His love.
An event different from finding out I was overdrawn at the bank, (again), happened in which I knew very well that I had hidden anger and resentful feelings about. Although I was trying to be more open and honest about those feelings , and believe God would still love me. Suddenly, I found out that the situation I was angry about had not been the way I had imagined it at all. It was kind of shocking really. To know that you had been angry at God for years about something, then decide to be honest about it, then to find out what you were angry about may not have been like you thought. PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE . Have you heard that term before ?
This is what Hiding From Love has to say about that style of hiding.
Passive -aggressive individuals tend to be highly resentful of others' supposed control over them, but they don't directly confront them. Instead, they show their anger in indirect ways, such as procrastination, sarcastic humor, "forgetfulness," and intentional inefficiency.
Somehow, I just know this has something to do with my poor money management problems. Boldly I have to admit that the way my parents handled their money choices has caused an anger issue in me. Indirectly that anger is pointed towards God, but of course I do not want it to be.
The recommended steps for changing this style of hiding is : Learn direct, face-to-face confrontation and appropriate expression of anger.
I am not sure what the appropriate expression is ,at this point I am just glad that it has been graciously revealed to me what I have been doing all this time. It is so wonderful to know that I belong to a loving God.
posted by Diane B at
5:44 AM
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